What to Do With Your Not-So-Healthy Partner
Are spending a lot of time like working on yourself, losing weight, getting healthy, and feeling great? But then the lump of love that is in your life is on the couch doing nothing? And it makes you crazy. So when you’re all jazzed about getting healthy, and really creating a new lifestyle for yourself, and your significant other doesn’t share that same viewpoint, what exactly can you do?
The first thing is stay positive and set the example. We would all love to be able to control people outside of ourselves. The reality is we can only control our own thoughts and emotions and actions. So, by our own thoughts, emotions and actions, we can hopefully, set a positive example for the people around us and hope that they start to pick up on this energy and imitate it.
On top of that, as you’re setting this positive example, it’s amazing if you can also add in positive reinforcement.
Next, find out what is their motivation? What are their goals? What do they want to see the future of their life being. And I think if you can start to understand that a little bit better, then maybe you can understand why they’re doing something, or why they’re showing resistance towards change. And then I think you can more easily help them through making those small micro shifts, that will add up to big results over time.
And then the last thing, check your own expectations. I think it’s so easy to create in our head, this perfect, imaginary partner that we want. And then when the real life version is there, and they’re not living up to the expectations, we’ve put in our own heads for them. Somehow, they’ve disappointed us. Even though everything that’s just happened now has happened solely in our own heads. This had nothing to do with what they did or did not do this is strictly based on what you want them to do or how you want them to change. So I think you have to be a little bit realistic also with your own expectations of another person. And again, if you’re finding that you are creating this vision of who you want this person to be, I encourage you to go back through steps 1, 2, and 3.
Peace and Love!